She's the oil that keeps us from creaking, she's the layer that keeps us apart.


I heart beautiful boys.

A pastor was walking through a small New England town when he saw a young boy walking toward him swinging a bird cage. At the bottom of the cage were three little wild birds, shivering with cold and fright. He stopped the boy and asked, "What you got there, son?"

"Just some old birds", the boy answered.

"What are you gonna do with them?"

"Take 'em home and have fun with 'em. I'm gonna tease 'em and pull out their feathers to make 'em fight. I'm gonna have a real good time."

"But you'll get tired of those birds sooner or later. What will you do?"

"Oh, I got some cats. They like birds. I'll take 'em to them."

The pastor was silent for a moment. "How much do you want for those birds, son?"

"Huh?! Why, you don't want them birds, mister. They're just plain old field birds. They don't sing. They ain't even pretty!"

"How much?" the pastor asked again.

The boy sized up the pastor as if he were crazy and answered, "$10?"

The pastor reached in his pocket and took out a ten dollar bill. He placed it in the boy's hand. In a flash, the boy was gone.

The pastor picked up the cage and gently carried it to the end of the alley where there was a tree and a grassy spot. Setting the cage down, he opened the door, and by softly tapping the bars, persuaded the birds out, setting them free.

One day, Satan and Jesus were having a conversation. Satan had come from the Garden of Eden and he was gloating and boasting. "Yes, sir, I just caught the world full of people down there. Set me a trap, used bait I knew they couldn't resist. Got 'em all!"

"What are you going to do with them?" Jesus asked.

"Oh, I'm gonna have fun! I'm gonna teach them how to marry and divorce each other, how to hate and abuse each other, how to drink and smoke and curse. I'm gonna teach them how to invent guns and bombs and kill each other. I'm really gonna have fun!"

"And what will you do when you get done with them?"

"Oh, I'll kill 'em," Satan glared proudly.

"How much do you want for them?"

"Oh, you don't want those people. They ain't no good. Why, you'll take them and they'll just hate you. They'll spit on you, curse you and kill you. You don't want those people!"

"How much?" He asked again.

Satan looked at Jesus and sneered, "All your blood, tears and your life."

And He paid the price.

The more we don't have time to pay attention to the little things, the more they will mean to us if we slow down for even a day. I think that's one of the best things about growing up.

It might not seem so with the fights and midnight trash-outs, but with time, some good moments and a little obedience, it is possible to one day text your mom at 10pm telling her you've already been out a couple of hours and will be home only after midnight, not get an angry phone call the second she's done reading it and not, either, throughout the night and still get home to a friendly mother. And remember: if your mother asks you to call her, call her, because by the time she's calling, she's already angry.

5 Reasons Why You Need Emergency Cash

Reason #1 So you can take impromptu trips to Malaysia, whichever part of it is necessary, and take firefly walks with your boyfriend, and tell him you're feeling crappy, because he seems to be the only person you need to tell it to. The only thing better than taking a bus there would be speeding there in your own car, in the middle of the night.

Reason #2 So you can cut your hair anytime you feel like it, the moment you feel like it, and get it cut by one of those stylists that are so expensive you will like your haircut, even if you don't.

Reason #3 So you can walk into a bar, ask for eighteen tequila shots and down them all, consecutively, and get so drunk you don't actually realize you exist, and then it'll go without saying that you'll have forgotten whatever it is that's making you crappy.

Reason #4 So you can engage in heavy doses of retail therapy - so much that the handles of your shopping bags are slicing into the palms of your hands and it hurts to lift a hand up to shift the article of clothing that's hanging on the horizontally-suspended pole in front of you for a better view and your four-inch closed-toe pumps are paralyzing you knees down and the colours in the shop are blinding you but you keep going because you just have so, much, pent-up energy inside you that can only come out via swipes of your atm card.

Reason #5 So that, even if all of the above-mentioned uncrappyfying methods sound unsatisfactory, you can at least bask in the knowledge that anything in the wide array of choices that your highly emotive state can come up with is possible; that impossible is nothing.

Did you know that the first Friday of June is National Doughnut Day? National Doughnut Day was established in 1938 during the Great Depression. It was initiated by the Chicago Salvation Army as a fundraiser for the needy and in honour of the Salvation Army "Lassies" of World War 1. "Lassies" were women who home-made doughnuts (among other foods) and sent them to Europe's front line soldiers to boost the soldiers' morale.

The "Lassies" remind me of Gail Halvorsen and Operation Little Vittles. I think it's sweet.

friends first